The Healthy Break Up

Relationships are a vital part of human behavior. We are social creatures and we form1405893.large many types of relationships from very early on. But, with relationships, come breakups. Breaking up can be devastating, but it can also be the best thing a person can do for his or her own mental and emotional health.

When people get into romantic relationships, the beginning is always great. They are happy and elated. It’s fresh and new. However, over time, things can change or they just learn that compatibility isn’t really present. After weighing all the options and a break up seems imminent, the best thing to do is be open, honest, communicate, and do not make excuses.

Sit the partner down and lay out all the cards. Tell him or her why you are unhappy. Be specific. Don’t berate or degrade him or her, but instead take responsibility for your part of the breakup and let him or her know why you feel there are no other options.

Break ups don’t necessarily have to occur between romantic partners, either. Many times friendships can be outgrown due to differing tastes or levels of maturity. This even happens with lifelong friendships! People just outgrow each other. When friendships break up, it can be particularly nasty due to the level of intimacy people share with close friends. I’d say these relationships can be even closer than romantic relationships at times. So, it is important to remember to be open and honest and actually talk about the reasons the relationship is ending or being put on hold. Don’t leave a long-term friendship on a bad note.

Sometimes we even break up with family members. These relationship breakups can be some of the most painful of all and the hardest to leave. However, if a relationship with a family member is not happy, healthy, and good for the well being of either party, a break up is necessary. Sometimes people simply do not adhere to the boundaries we place or the respect levels we require and it is extremely hard when a family is involved. These types of breakups can be bursting with emotion, painful, and even cathartic. Honesty is the most important thing in these situations, as well. Being kind but the firm is also of importance. Many times when breaking up with family, it is due to extreme personalities or horrible situations that have been placed upon a person. In these cases, therapy could be beneficial, but a healing must occur and many times that healing requires a breakup.

No matter what type of relationship, almost no break up is easy. However, they can all be healthy. Just remember that honesty and communication remain key in any break up that occurs.

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